Trusting God as We and Our Kids Step Into What’s Next (with Judy Fulmer)

Read the blog post for this episode HERE: Trusting God as We and Our Kids Step Into What’s Next (with Judy Fulmer)

In this episode, I talk with Judy Fulmer, founder of College PrepXcel, an independent educational consulting company that guides students skillfully and strategically through the college admissions process so they know what to expect—and how to truly stand out.

Judy helps parents and teens navigate the often-overwhelming world of college prep with clarity and confidence. She works with all families, but as a former homeschool mom herself, she carries a special place in her heart for homeschooling parents walking this journey.

Together, we talk about what it looks like to trust God through the transition from homeschooling to higher education—and how His grace opens doors for both parents and students in every new season. If you’re a mom preparing your teen for college or simply navigating this next chapter of parenting, this conversation will remind you that God is already preparing the way.

Transcript

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Audrey McCracken 1:13

Hello friends. Welcome back to Grace for My Home. I'm Audrey McCracken and I am delighted to be back with you again this week. Please forgive me for being a little stuffy. So if I sound stuffy, I am. But luckily I recorded this podcast last week before I was so stuffy. I have a special treat for you this week. I have my first interview. I've been doing the podcast here for about three years now. I've done 150 episodes or so, and I have never had a guest. I've always flown solo, but I'm branching out. I have a friend who I think you will connect with. Her name is Judy Former, and we've gotten to know each other over the last year, year and a half, and I just adore Judy, and I think you will too. Last week I had the opportunity to talk with Judy a little about homeschooling and about what she does. She we're in a very similar season of life. We are former homeschool moms trying to figure out what God has for us now in this new season of life. And I just hope that you enjoy this conversation we had. We certainly did. We enjoyed talking and getting to know each other a little more. Just to tell you a little bit about Judy, she is an independent educational consultant and she specializes in

Host Intro And First-Ever Guest

Audrey McCracken 2:25

college admissions counseling. She helps high school students with SAT ACT Prep, and she's the founder of College Prep Excel. Judy and her husband Philip, they've been married for 34 years and they live in Marion, South Carolina. Philip, her husband, serves as the pastor of Ebenezer Church, and he's also a physics and engineering professor at Francis Marion University, which is in Florence, South Carolina. They have four grown children, three sons and one daughter. In addition to her work with college-bound students, Judy also serves in ministry with community Bible study. She also serves as a childhood cancer advocate. I just love Judy. She has a heart of gold. So let's get started with today's podcast. Well, Judy, welcome to Grace for My Home. It's such a blessing to have you with us today. And I'm so excited to have you here. You're my first guest. Okay. You're my first actual interview here. Um, I've been wanting to do this for a long time, and you just were the perfect guest to do this because I knew you'd have Grace and me. Absolutely. And um, and I'm Judy and I met at Awakened Coffee Shop, the coffee shop that I run for my church. She came in early on when we first opened, and she and some of her friends, and we had an immediate connection. Both of us loved Jesus, both of us are pastors' wives. We were both, Judy, you're you were an engineering major, weren't you? Yep. You were both in, I thought so. We were both engineer majors. We were former homeschool moms, and so it just, you know, we it just clicked.

Shared Roots: Faith, Homeschool, Engineering

Audrey McCracken 4:06

And I thought there's a kindred spirit right there. But Judy, welcome. Can you and I and I shared a little bit in the intro about you and and what you do now and and and what you have done, but can you just share a little bit about yourself?

Judy Fulmer 4:21

Sure. Well, first, thank you so much for having me. This is truly enjoying, and you know, I just absolutely love you. You are so dear to me. You really are. So as you mentioned, um, I'm a former homeschool mama, and golly, we homeschooled for about 17 years. And that's I never I don't really count preschool, but you know, we did homeschool for preschool too. So it's probably about 20 years all said and done. But it was such a a precious time of life. I loved my time homeschooling. We did have our kids in a private school for a little while while I was caring for my mom. Um I'm an only child, and mom moved here from Texas. She was terminally ill, and she passed away about halfway through there and um through that time, and then I taught at the school for a couple of months, a couple more years. But you know, the Lord called us back home. While, you know, we were home. I guess we're trying to remember how old the kids were when we came home. Our youngest was going in fourth grade, our oldest would have been in going into ninth grade. We have four kids and they're within five years, so they're pretty tight.

Judy’s Homeschool Story And Family

Judy Fulmer 5:34

Three boys and a girl in six years. In five years.

Audrey McCracken 5:38

Five years. Oh, bless your heart. Okay. Four kids.

Judy Fulmer 5:41

Yeah, they're not actually two years apart. They're none of them are actually two years apart. They're all less than two years. Um, our two middle kids are 19 months apart, they're the closest. But um, but anyway, so you know, as Jonathan was in high school, one of the things I've always taken homeschooling, I always took it very seriously. I knew the buck stopped with me. And I wanted to make sure that my kids had a really great education, a good social network, but I also wanted to make sure they didn't miss opportunities because we homeschooled. That was something that was always kind of on my mind. I was always looking around to see what I could do, what I could offer them to take their interests deeper. And you know, when you're homeschooling, you have more time to do those things. So that was pretty cool. Um and so I guess I think our oldest might have been a sophomore. And I had found this camp. I don't know if it's still going on. It was through the Celebrate Freedom Foundation. So it was an aviation camp with a leadership component. So they had this whole leadership curriculum built in. It was a really great camp. Kids actually got to fly Cessna while they were there. It was awesome. But the whole focus was on engineering and aerospace. It was really good. But it was competitive. It, you know, you had to apply. And um, so I remember he was working through that application and he comes to me. I remember distinctly where I was standing when this happened. He's like, Mom, what what were my extracurriculars? What are my volunteer activities? What leadership things have I done? And I think that's one of the things when you're homeschooling, um, these things are just part of your lifestyle. You don't realize there's anything unique about the things that you're doing.

Audrey McCracken 7:37

I actually I remember my kids, it's just live.

Judy Fulmer 7:40

You know, they go, Well, we don't do anything about any volunteer service. I'm like, wait, let me think. I no, yes,

The Guidance Counselor Wake-Up Moment

Judy Fulmer 7:47

you do. You've been running the sound at church for the past six years, you know. Stack tables and chairs every Sunday, every Wednesday. I mean, like, as we thought through what they do in our community, we served with OM ships quite a bit and did different things. It was like, no, we actually are doing that. But that question, you know, he threw a bunch at me. You know, I need what's my GPA and what's this and what blah blah blah, all these things. And I went, yeah, we need a high school guidance counselor. And I remember it struck me like so it was like a brick. I went, whoa, that's me. I remember, oh no, that's me. I'm it, I'm the guidance counselor. Oh my goodness. I felt this weight come down on me. And I read and I mean it was a defining moment. I said, you know what? I'm gonna take ownership of this because I knew he was on a college path. He ended up, I two of my kids were valedictorians of Grace Homeschool Association. Like I knew they were headed to college, and I said, Man, I I don't want to mess this up.

Audrey McCracken 9:04

You know? Yes, I know that I remember with homeschool, you're as the homeschool mom, you're taking on such a responsibility. You know, there's no one else to blame. You can't blame the guidance counselor or the principal or the the teacher or the system because it's all on you. And I remember many times that realization landed on my shoulders, and I thought, oh my goodness, I gotta get, I gotta figure this thing out. Cause like you said, there's no, there's no one like authority to go to to figure it out. And there's so many different ways to homeschool. And so I was constantly like researching and trying to to figure out, you know, what do we do? And and we weren't sure. I would have loved to homeschool through the high school years. We didn't, but when I hear your story, it you know, I think I wish I had known you when my kids were at home. When I I think you would have given me a little bit of comfort, a little bit of hope that, hey, we can do this, you know, because there's a lot of fear. You know, homeschool moms really struggle a lot with um, you know, why am I doing this? What should I be doing? Am I preparing? My biggest fear was not preparing them for the life that I wanted to be able to set them up. You know what I mean? I want to set them up so that they can do whatever God's called them to do, and nothing I did would hinder that. You know, I'm necessarily, you know, and I and then and now when I look back, you know, I I know a lot of it was grace, a lot of it was just, you know, God's good. Um, and they're very resilient. But it would have been so nice to have somebody like you to sit down and talk with and just say, what should I be doing now to prepare for those high school years?

Judy Fulmer 10:48

Yeah, for sure. I do that with my clients. I'm able to sit down and make some course

Overcoming Fear And Doing Enough

Judy Fulmer 10:55

planning um suggestions and teach the kids some life skills they may not realize they need to do and uh need to know. One of the things that happened during that time, I told you I I really took some ownership of this and I did. I researched just like you did. I realized the buck stopped with me. And also I think you hit the nail on the head when you were talking about that fear and that insecurity. I think, honestly, I think the homeschool mantra is, am I doing enough? I know that was my question. And I've not ever met a homeschooler who didn't ask, am I doing enough? Are my kids gonna be prepared? Are they gonna be able to hold their own? Am I giving them enough foundation and background? What I learned, at least at my house, I really had high expectations. My kids were very well prepared. But when they got to college, we had this whole conversation. I was like, now you're gonna see, now you're gonna see how challenging it is. And they all came home. Every one of them came home and said, Oh, it's so much easier than I was going.

Audrey McCracken 12:03

My kids said the same thing about high school. They were like, Mama, we're overprepared. I felt like not underprepared. I did my job. Exactly.

Judy Fulmer 12:15

You know, but but I think the thing that reassured me was when my kids did go into a school a traditional school system for that four-year period. And I realized they were holding their own. They were actually at the top of the class and they were prepared. So that helped me to help others, you know. It's not that I would change anything that I was doing. I continued when we returned back to homeschooling. I continued on the same path that we had been on because I did see them lose some of their skill. They actually declined a little bit academically. That wasn't the only reason. I mean, uh ultimately, God said go home. He flat said go home. And I was like, what do you mean you go home? What exactly do you mean? Because I wasn't sure I wanted to jump back into it. It's a lot of work. It's a lot, it's a lot. Yes. And so, yeah, I thought he meant invest yourself in your community. Well, uh I rationalized that he meant that we needed to invest ourselves in our community because we were driving to another town for school and really everything we did socially was happening over there. And so I was like, maybe he means that we need to get more invested in our own community, you know, bloom where you're planted. And that was part of it. But the the next year he was like, I told you to go home. And I was like, Okay, and we did, and I had no regrets. And then I found out after the fact that our kids had had some talent as I didn't realize. Um, so it turned out to be a really good thing that we were able to pour into them and help them overcome some of the stuff they were dealing with. But um brought all four children back home to but you know, as we were working in high school and I was learning all these things about scholarships and college admissions and you know, just prepping my kids in this way. Other homeschoolers are asking me questions, and you know, I'm speaking to our homeschool group and I'm giving little workshops and I'm learning all these things. And then after our kids graduated, they did well. We were really, really blessed. Um,

Returning Home And Academic Fit

Judy Fulmer 14:27

you know, they they earned top scholarships and they got through college without undergraduate debt. And so people are asking, how are you doing that? And I the more I talked with other homeschool families and even friends who had kids in other school systems, I realized there's a big need for this. And that's how College Prep Excel was born. It was really born out of my heart to serve the homeschool families because we didn't have anybody in that college admissions role really guiding us step by step through. And you know, and and again, most of these families were single income. So you want to get through school without a lot of debt. Um so you know, a small investment on the front end saves you uh tens of thousands on the back end, and and that's why the business was born. I serve all the students, I serve public, private, homeschooled anybody, but that's where it came from.

Audrey McCracken 15:28

And let me ask you this are there anything like if there's a homeschool mom listening right now, and maybe she doesn't have high schoolers, but say middle school or even elementary school, are there any things that you would suggest that she start doing right now? Like what are some things, or even if it's not doing thinking about, like planning for the future, if she wants her her kids to be ready for high school and for eventually for entering in college and this kind of things, what kind of things should she be thinking about?

Judy Fulmer 16:02

Well, at the younger ages, you know, older elementary, middle school, make sure they can communicate, make sure they can write well. That's good. You know, there's a big difference between the written language and verbal language. And a lot of students I'm seeing don't understand that distinction. And so, um not specifically in the homeschool environment, just in general. So teaching a child to communicate and you and with all of the new challenges that AI is bringing, students are becoming reliant on AI to produce their papers. And I can look at something and deter, I mean, it's easy for me to tell what was AI written and what was not. Because an AI produced document cannot, it's not really personal, it's not thoughtful. You can't really work through your thoughts and creative ideas the same way through AI that you can otherwise. You know, and and then also if you plug something into an AI to have it review it for grammar or whatever, then it goes into the large language, what is it, the language learning model. So what I'm seeing with students is they wrote something, they had it evaluated by AI. Maybe they said make it clear and concise, maybe you know, check it for grammar or whatever. It's their product that AI tuned up, and now they've sent it to a school and the school runs it through their AI checker

Birth Of College Prep Excel

Judy Fulmer 17:38

because they don't allow AI produced things. Well, because it's been added to this language learning model, now it's flagged as having been AI, it's flagged as plagiarism. So there are all these nuances now that the kids are dealing with. So I would teach them I I would teach them to write well. I would teach them uh how to actually study. And that's one of the benefits of homeschool is that the kids learn how to learn. So learning critical thinking skills, learning communication skills, learning study skills, those are really, really valuable things. But then, you know, just uh identifying a child's interest, you know, if you can step back, because a lot of times there are things in us that we don't see, but the people around us see. So if you can help foster and develop those interests, because the colleges now, when I went through school, they wanted you to be well-rounded, which meant a member of 25 clubs, you know. The more better. Yeah, it was like a the more the better mentality. The more the better when I was coming out of high school and going into college. But now the schools are saying, well, we want a student to be well-rounded because you do have a lot of elite athletes and other things, and and that may be the only thing they do because it's so time consuming. They're like, we want to see a little bit more than that. But we want a student to really go deeper in their area of interest. So, say you want to be a nurse or a doctor. Okay, what are you doing to expose yourself to this field so you even know if this is something you want to do? Listen, some kids, it's crazy. Some of these kids are actually doing research with university professors and publishing papers in high school.

Audrey McCracken 19:30

I can't even fathom that. Yes, that's awesome. And that was one of the things I loved about homeschool, is it was you could be so out of the box. Oh yeah. You if you had an interest

Early Prep: Writing, Study, Critical Thinking

Audrey McCracken 19:42

in something, you could deep dive into that. And we had the time to do that. I love that freedom. And that's why I think it's so nice to when you can tailor a curriculum for that child. That sounds a little intimidating sometimes for somebody who's just starting out. Like, who am I to tailor a curriculum? Well, you know that kid better than anybody.

Judy Fulmer 20:05

That's right.

Audrey McCracken 20:06

And you know, and and and it's really not as um, what's the word? It sounds a lot more intimidating than it is, because it's just finding something that that lights that spark and developing something or you know, finding things to do around that. And I I loved that. That was my favorite part of homeschool, is we can do whatever we want to do, you know. We can't, you know, we can't do that. And but I like I said, I I do wish I had somebody like you at that time because there's so much fear on for homeschool moms, like like you said earlier, what if I don't do enough, you know, and and we all face that. And I think part of that is because we don't have sometimes we are isolated and we don't see what other people are doing. And so we often think we're not doing enough. Everybody else is doing enough, but I'm not doing enough. How what kind of things have you seen? Like what when when people come to you, when when parents come to you and they're like, help us, what kind of misconceptions do they have about college and high school and and what they should be doing versus what they are doing? Do you see a lot of that, like a lot of fear-based decisions? That yeah.

Judy Fulmer 21:17

Oh yeah, definitely. You know, I see the whole gamut and and not just homeschooling, but in in other school situations. I've seen some families who don't challenge their students enough. And they really, the student could do more, and they just simply don't do it. I actually had this conversation with a couple of homeschool girls the other day and they were talking about the the program that they use. Like one of them actually said, I don't feel like I'm learning anything. And and she said this program that she's using, she she's doing some online school, and she said, I can go back and retake and retake and retake until I ace it. So I do I do see some misconceptions there that uh the parents want something maybe a little easy for them. They want something that's gonna teach everything and grade everything, and and

Depth Over Breadth In Activities

Judy Fulmer 22:13

I I think sometimes maybe the the kids pay the price on that.

Audrey McCracken 22:18

I I completely I see that. Yes, I I'm all for easy. You know, if it's easy and it works, I think that's great. But I I think you're right. I think sometimes we can sacrifice easy for actually learning. I won't call the name. We had a math, um math was hard for us. When I say math was hard for us, I mean I thought it would be easy for us because you know, I was an engineering major. My husband was a math, he was a math teacher, and I thought, oh, you know, we got math, but I had a hard time finding a math that my kids liked, and you know, they didn't necessarily have to be fun math, right? It didn't have necessarily have to be fun, but it has to be where they will sit down and there won't be tears, you know. I'm like, I don't think I've set the bar too high, you know. I just I just don't want to cry every day. Yeah, and so we struggled with finding the right math. And I remember somebody said, Oh, you should do this math, it's so easy. And so for a whole half a year, we did that math, and it was easy, but they learned nothing. Oh, when it was all said and done, they passed all the tests, but they didn't understand the concepts. They could they could figure it out, they could figure out how to answer the questions, but they didn't really understand math. And I thought this was easy and with the price, and so we kind of had to start all over, you know, and and and and that was another nice thing about homeschooling is we could just start all over, right? We could just mid-year say, this isn't working, and you know, I think often the homeschoolers feel like they're behind, but you have so much time, yeah. You know, you and I and you might think, well, my son, my son's a senior or junior. You really like a a homeschool year and a public school year is so different, you know. Even my my middle son, he struggled because he was the kid who who would get up early, get everything done. So

Curriculum Choices And Real Learning

Audrey McCracken 24:18

he had a whole afternoon to do whatever he wanted to do. He would get up at six o'clock in the morning and I'd be like, Why are you up? You know, I'm trying to have a by myself, you know, and he's like, I'm getting my math done and I'm getting my, you know, I'm getting this done because he wanted to go tramps in the woods and do whatever he wanted to do.

Judy Fulmer 24:36

Right.

Audrey McCracken 24:37

So when he started public school, that was very hard for him. He said, Mama, we waste so much time. Yeah. You know, we waste so much time, you know, because he wanted to just get it done. And and I said, Well, honey, that's public education. You you have to go with the group. You don't, you can't jump ahead and do your so I and and that's an advantage. I think sometimes, you know, when we feel like we're behind or we don't have enough time, you've got more time than you think. Yeah. You can you you can change things mid-year and still end up in a good place.

Judy Fulmer 26:21

So I think there's a lot of reassurance that that homeschool mamas are doing a really good job. And like you said before, they know their child better than anybody. There's nobody that cares more that that child learned than their parent.

Audrey McCracken 26:55

Yes, that's exactly that's you know, that's what I kept telling myself too. You know, I I would say, yes, there are probably there definitely there are people who understand how to teach this curriculum better than me. And there are probably homeschool mamas who could who would who could do this a lot better than me, but nobody loves them as much as I love them, and nobody is gonna spend the time to to find what they need more than I am, you know, and sometimes that means finding somebody else to teach them. You know, we did that for tutors in areas where I didn't feel confident

Time, Pace, And Homeschool Flexibility

Audrey McCracken 27:30

and and you know, and we found online classes in areas where I knew I don't want to, I don't want to, like you said before, I don't want to limit them because we're homeschooled, right? I want homeschooling to be an advantage to them, not you know, I don't want them to look back and say, I really wish my mom hadn't homeschooled me. You know, I want them to be like, yes, I'm so glad my mom gave me a jump on life, you know. Right. And and that's how I see homeschooling. You know, we we were, I was very careful when we went into it that we're not doing this out of fear, we're doing this faith. You know, this is a faith thing, this is a faith journey. Like you said, God called you home. You know, if God's asking this of me, he's gonna give me the grace to do it well. And you know, and it may not look like everybody else's journey, but that's okay. We don't look like everybody else's family, you know.

Judy Fulmer 28:20

You know, my kids took art lessons from a professional artist, they took a physiology lab from a critical care nurse, they took um Institute for Excellence in Writing. Man, I absolutely loved that curriculum. IEW. We loved IEW. I loved it. They took that. I couldn't get my kids to write for me. It was oh yeah, griping, complaining, whining, delaying, procrastinating, but they would do it for these women when my kids were babies and we were just thinking about homeschooling and you know, like they were preschoolers, right? I remember looking at these women who had teenagers who were in our homeschool group. This this was when we lived in Aiken. We didn't even live here. I remember looking at them and going, wow, she's so godly. I want to be like her. I mean, I remember thinking that those life goals. I want to be like this woman. I want to be like that woman. They, their kids are amazing kids, and these women just love Jesus. They are so godly, they just like radiate the love of Christ. I want to be like that. And you know what I learned? Homeschooling all my kids, they got that way being in the fire every day and on their knees. It's like there's nothing really truly easy about homeschooling, but it is the best thing I've ever done.

Audrey McCracken 29:48

Well, I I tell people that my not specifically homeschooling, but my children and being home with them all day, they were like sandpaper for my soul. Yeah, like they they polished the rough edges. There were there were things in me that God worked out because I was at home all day with my children, and I didn't want them to have a mean, hateful mom. Like I wanted them to have memories of a mom that smiled and a mom that liked them. Yes, I thought, wouldn't you hate to be stuck home all day with somebody who didn't like you or somebody who's just mad all the time or irritable? And so it it it caused me to be a better person. So, Judy, what kind of like I know like right

Love, Standards, And Outsourcing Help

Audrey McCracken 30:37

now my kids are preparing. I have one who's in college freshman year, I have one who is preparing for college next year. Um, it is uh it can be frustrating. Like last night, he sat down with his laptop and he's filling out his applications, he's doing the things that I've asked him to do for months. You know, he's finally, you know, his guidance counselors asked him to do for months. What kind of things like do you run into when it comes to like um, you know, how do you help with that process? Because it can be really. It can be hard. Like, I'm not sure that I we've started it. I know we've not started it soon enough. I mean, I know we haven't, but we've started it. Um, you know, what what kind of advice do you have? Or do you see that a lot? Is it just us? Like, what's what's the deal?

Judy Fulmer 31:28

No, it's not just you. I mean, think about it. Anytime we're working, well, we were talking about it a few minutes ago when we were talking about teaching your kids to write and how they wouldn't write for us, but they wrote really well for somebody else. I find that to be true in this situation too. College admissions, this senior year is such an exciting year, and it's a busy year, but it can also be really stressful, you know, and and the parents have the wisdom and the forethought, the foresight to know that kids need to back up their schedule and you know, this has to be done by here. So that means you need to start preparing for it here, and you need to get this done here. And the kids are like, I'll get to it, I'll get to it. Well, the the parent and the student often butt heads. And that's a really hard thing because there's all the emotion tied up in senior year. And, you know, mom's like, I just, I, I don't want us to fight, I don't want us to argue, they're about to graduate and they're gonna go off to college, blah, blah, blah. Like, I get it. Poor kids over here. Um, but one of the things that I do is just like we were saying with the writing, my kid listens to them, they won't listen to me. Well, that happens with college admissions. A parent can tell their child the same thing and they'll completely ignore their parent. I tell them and they're like, oh, really? It's crazy. But it's the fact. It is a fact. And the other thing is that I'm able to sit down. If sometimes me just telling them, hey, we need to do this, we need to get this done. I want you to work on it, and we'll meet next week. And they do it. Sometimes they either aren't sure how to get started or they're just not motivated. So I sit with them one-on-one and we do it together real time. But I'm able to get them to the goal where sometimes mom and dad can't help them, can't get them to realize the importance of these deadlines. But they are important. And you don't want to miss them because missing these deadlines can affect not only acceptance, but award money, you know?

Audrey McCracken 33:39

So you can kind of act like the buffer, the go thing, kind of like the referee between like, I know we need to do this, but we're button heads trying to get it done.

Judy Fulmer 33:50

Yeah, and it saves the parents a lot of time, it reduces their stress. And also, you know, parents are having to do all this research and try to figure these things out. And I just I know it because I'm talking to the schools and I'm working with the kids. Yeah. So it can save a lot of time and save a lot of stress.

Audrey McCracken 34:09

Yes. And well, well, Judy, I don't want, I know that we've talked a long time. I don't want to keep you all day. Um, but I do I have enjoyed talking to you. This has been a blessing. Um, what would you say to a mom that is

Senior Year Stress And Deadlines

Audrey McCracken 34:24

um she's nearing that the end of her homeschool journey and um she's wondering what's next for her children, but also for her. Like, how have you transitioned from homeschool mom to what you do now? And and do you have any advice for that mom that's like this because for me, and I'll just throw this in there. For me, homeschooling was being a homeschool mom was so much a part of my identity that when that was gone, felt like I was just kind of out on the island. What do I do now?

Judy Fulmer 34:58

I uh I that resonates. So here's the thing. We, you know, we went through a tough time with our daughter when she was in eighth, ninth, tenth grade. She was very ill. Um, and that changed. She had so she was in cancer treatment and she had some challenges coming out of that. And I had to completely change how I homeschooled her. She's great now, but all that to say, I was I was getting tired. I I was it was a lot to homeschool for high achieving students within five years of age. It was a lot. And so there was this part of me that was so glad to be done, but there was this part of me that felt completely lost. I did not know what to do with myself. Um I struggled because my husband has worked two full-time jobs for many, many years as a professor and a pastor, both full-time positions. And I I I felt bad not having a job. You know, like I need to contribute to this family, but I didn't know what to do. I seriously considered going back to college because I am I love to learn. I'm a lifelong learner, which is actually a great thing for the job that I do because I am a student of colleges. I am constantly learning so that I can help my my families. But I went through this period where I just I cried out to the Lord, I didn't know what

How Coaching Eases Parent-Student Tension

Judy Fulmer 36:35

I was gonna do. I wanted to be productive, I wanted to help others, but I didn't know what I was gonna do. And to be honest, I started a little like a little MLM kind of business, which I still have. It's not my priority, but I believe in the product. And that came kind of out of the cancer journey was, you know, I need to protect my child from exposures to toxins that could result in another cancer. So I started working with Norwax because it gave me a platform, if you will, to be able to share with others about toxins in our environment. But that wasn't that wasn't my home, if you will. That wasn't, that wasn't my calling. And so through a whole lot of prayer, really evaluating what what my interests are, my background, if you look at me, if you look at my history, it's funny when I look back at it. You know, I have an engineering degree, radiological health engineering from Texas AM University and a master's in health physics. Well, while I was in grad school, I was asked to teach a class called Becoming the Master Student. And when I look back, I see how the Lord has just woven these threads together as a tapestry. He he taught me and helped me teach others these basic skills that you need to succeed in college way back. And then he gave me the opportunity to substitute in the public schools and to teach in a private school for a couple of years and to homeschool my kids. So I have well over 20 years of education and then you know, the opportunity to guide my own kids into college admissions. And, you know, when I look at this, I'm like, so I'm a college admissions consultant. I'm an expert in SAT and ACT prep,

Identity After Homeschool And Calling

Judy Fulmer 38:33

and and all the different steps along the way to help a student from this early high school, late middle school stage until they're really even all the way through, they've received their acceptances and let's make decisions about what's the best fit and let's talk about transitioning to college. But it's all these other experiences that flowed into qualifying me for that and a crazy amount of training. I'm always in training, always, always in training. And so I started learning some skills. And I think you have to be a little bit uh patient with yourself. But I'll tell you, I've learned two things that I think anybody in this position needs to think about. The first one is if you don't quit, you'll win. You know, you can do a lot more than you think you can do, but we give up too easily.

Audrey McCracken 39:30

Yes. You we we count ourselves done before we yeah, we kind of count ourselves as a failure before it's over, right?

Judy Fulmer 39:38

And you can say that about homeschooling too. But even this transition into into life after homeschooling is just remembering that there are there's more to you than you realize. And there's there's much more ability, and and others need what you have to offer. You have unique experiences that can really benefit others. So you're evaluating, you know, what are my gifts? What are my talents? What what are my what do I have to share with others? In my case, I realized my husband and I talked about it for years. I could help other families get through this, navigate this process and successfully not just get their children into any random college, but their best fit college that's really going to help them thrive. And I can help them understand the processes and find the scholarships and do all the things. There's something in each one of you.

Audrey McCracken 40:38

Yes, exactly.

Judy Fulmer 40:40

Is amazing. Let's let's pull that out and develop that. But the other thing that I learned was that the answers are there and you just have to go find them. And even now, I mean, there's so many, many more resources at our fingertips than than I had starting out, or think about 10 years ago. So many more resources.

Audrey McCracken 41:04

You know, just the way that you've pulled them together and gathered them for people, that's huge. You know, the even the resources, there's a lot of those resources that were out there, but you've gathered them for people, like you've put them all in one spot. And you know, and that's that's that saves so much time and money. Oh yeah. I mean, because you know, where I would have, if I was starting from scratch, I wouldn't even know where to start. You've done a lot of that legwork, and then you have the wisdom that goes with the years that you've done that work for yourself, for your kids, and and for other people. And that's invaluable. I mean, it really is. And it's very tailored. I know you, I know you work with more than just homeschool students, but it's very tailored to what our needs are, you know, from transitioning from high school to college and and making those decisions. It's hard to make the right decisions unless you have the right information.

Judy Fulmer 41:58

Yeah.

Audrey McCracken 41:59

And sometimes you don't even know the questions to ask, you know, and you know, that transition for for moms, because once you make those transitions, you know, like I said, I I struggled and and I'm still working through that. You know, what am I supposed to be doing with my days? Because so much of your our life is wrapped

Skills, Training, And A New Vocation

Audrey McCracken 42:17

up in those kids. And, you know, when they start to make those decisions on their own, and we have to back up, it's kind of like, well, where's my place now? You know, where's my place? And um, you know, I appreciate all that you do for moms, I appreciate all you do for the homeschool moms and the community and the homeschool community. Um, just this week I had an opportunity to speak at um in Mullins, the Baptist Church in Mullins, the um WMU group. Oh, and it was it was a blessing. I have a friend who who who is a part of that, and she asked me to come speak to their group. And and I remember thinking there was a time I wouldn't have time to do this. Like there was a time I couldn't just go do this. And then even as I was speaking to these ladies, I had an opportunity to share with them, you know, there's ministry all around us. We just have to have eyes open to see. And once we're released from one assignment, and that's how I feel. I feel like homeschooling my children was an assignment. And once we're released from that assignment or completed that assignment, you know, we have to have eyes to see where's where's my next assignment? Where's God sending me now? And um, and and he, you know, he's been showing me, Audrey, there's ministry all around you. Oh, yeah. It's not always packaged neatly, you know, there's not always a neon sign over it, but there are needs that you are uniquely created to meet. Yeah, you just have to find, you have to find your people. You have to find your people, you have to find, you know, what God, what what have you put me here for this time to do? And um, and share that gift. And like you said, that's a gift, that's a gift that God's given you, but it's also a gift, you're a gift that God's given us. And um, and thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for sharing with our group today. We'll have you back on again and talk about other things. And I tell you what, before we go, yeah, I'm gonna put you on the spot. Um, why don't you pray for these ladies that are listening today and just searching for God's plan for their life? Just pray that you know God would would open up the right doors.

Judy Fulmer 44:31

Yeah, absolutely. Heavenly Father, oh, we just love you. And we thank you, Lord, that you are sovereign and you you have this plan, this perfect, perfect plan. We just thank you that we can come before your throne of grace. Yes, because it is a privilege and an honor, and we we bless your name. We do thank you that you have this plan and it's a good, good plan for us, a plan to bless us and give us a future and a hope. And Father, for a woman who may be coming to the end of her homeschool journey, wherever that is along the way of age with her children, Lord, I just pray that you would speak into her heart and give her some guidance and some direction, reassure her that you see her because you do. Reassure her that you know uh the the call of her heart and that you will use her to bless and minister to others. These transitions, even though they're uncomfortable, they can be very, very fruitful. And Lord, I thank you that you give us the opportunity to rest a little bit in you and just come back come back to you and to sit in your lap and and uh be held. So I just pray that you would do that for the woman who is uh who is in this position today, who's looking for the next step, because you you know what that step is. And and you're faithful to show us. So I thank you, Lord, that you guide and you direct, and I pray that you would do that for her today. And I thank you so much for Audrey and her ministry. Thank you for this podcast. Thank you for blessing it mightily, and I just pray that you will continue to grow it and to bless

Encouragement For Transitioning Moms

Judy Fulmer 46:24

it in Jesus' name. Amen. Amen. Amen. I agree.

Audrey McCracken 46:28

Thank you, thank you, Judy.